Ever get the feeling like you don’t fit in? That you’re a bit ‘different’….that you’re searching for something and you’re not too sure where to find it? Frustrated or overwhelmed? This is me today. I have waves of enjoying the feeling of uniqueness and then other times, I feel like I’m never going to feel satisfied with ‘my lot’. I read countless books – spiritual, personal development, autobiographical, psychological – I even found myself reading the Holy Bible in a Premier Inn the other night (ha – until I finally gave up on the ‘meaning of life’ and watched Sarah Millican on telly instead). And that’s just it. I gave in. I switched off. I turned my attention to something far more light hearted. What a lovely phrase – ‘light hearted’. Take a sigh right now. Breathe in and then SIGH. How does that feel? It’s nice isn’t it. To let go and release.
I’m not saying that every time I feel sad, low, frustrated, tired or lonely I can just sigh and say, “ahhh I feel great”. As I’ve said before, I don’t think it works like that. I think feelings travel through us and we have to allow it to happen. My favourite strategy of dealing with it is to accept that it’s ok to feel that way and have the confidence to know it’ll pass. I say this occasionally in my yoga classes, especially when I can see students battling with their emotions when it gets challenging. However, I have found a highly effective way of enjoying the lows. And that is to change my surroundings and treat myself to a little pleasure. My little pleasure at the mo is to go out, buy a small bag of salt and vinegar Kettle Chips with a chai tea or fizzy water and enjoy them in a nice environment. I tend to like being on my own in times of reflection but you may need to be around others. This is where you have to respect your uniqueness and not follow the crowd. I firmly believe YOU MUST do what is genuinely going to be positively healing for you whilst the feelings pass through. For me, I’ve taken note of what makes me happy. I often write a list of things that have made me smile or feel good. And they are the simplest of things – like a chai tea in a cafe, or going to yoga, seeing a friend, writing a letter, making raw chocolate (believe me this is SO simple when you know how). Now I’ll add to that list eating Kettle Chips (a small bag remember) and drinking fizzy water.
Oh, and if you’re reading this thinking that I’m strange. I know. I feel it too sometimes. But I’m OK with it now. Must have been that exhale.